I've just been listening to "Woman's Hour" on Radio 4 as I did the ironing. One of the topics covered was the idea of loneliness. I felt they missed the point to some extent.
I confess I find loneliness a rather frightening sensation. Their solution seemed to be to deliberately go out to some social situation to meet people & talk. And yet, in my experience, some of the times when I've felt loneliest is in a crowd. It's that coffee party where no one talks to you, that party you don't feel a part of. It's not the same as being alone.
I really appreciate times of being alone. I sometimes think that part of the success of our marriage is that we both allow each other a bit of the day to be alone. We both need that time. For me, being alone means I can be utterly selfish, doing what I want, wrapped up within my own thoughts, not needing to compromise in any way to fit in with other people. It's a source of healing & of strength that enables me to cope with the demands of the day whatever they may be.
Loneliness is quite different. Loneliness is totally negative. It's that sense of isolation, of being a leper, unlovable, undesirable, of somehow being a lesser being. I'm glad to say I don't often get lonely, or for very long spells, but I have every sympathy for those who do.
2 comments:
sounds like Woman's Hour didn't simply lose the plot but never understood what the plot was in the first place. Your second paragraph is spot on - I can totally identify!
I couldn't help thinking of your encounter at the church open coffee morning, Malcolm, as I wrote my blog. Now that's a real cause for feeling lonely! The Vixen
Post a Comment