Out of touch

We’re coming to the conclusion we’re increasingly becoming out of touch with modern society & culture.

Part of what prompted this thought is that we recently seemed to have watched a lot of TV quiz shows from “University Challenge” to “Pointless” to “Tipping Point” to “The Chase”. We usually do quite well on more academic subjects, on topics like history. However you can forget us when it comes to pop music & sport. Increasingly we are aware that we cannot names actors in more recent films, writers of more recent books. We seem to be in a bit of a time warp.

It has to be admitted that it is largely the result of becoming disabled over twenty years ago. As a result I left the work force, and not much later, the Fox too left official working to become my full-time carer - mind you I think that must sometimes be harder, more demanding, work than any paid job he ever had but that’s a different point. As a result our lives have tended to revolve around each other. I haven’t the energy to maintain much of a social life so we rarely go out in the evening. In the afternoon we often pop to a pub but then we either end up on our own or talking to friends who inevitably tend to be elderly as they are the only people around at that time of day. Our conversations tend to go about our lives, our personal history, our medical problems. Our only contact with younger people tends to be with the bar staff who are usually too busy to spend much time sharing their lives & concerns with us old fogies.

We have no children. Younger members of our extended family live some distance away so we have rarely had chance to see them, let alone get to know them. We live in a quiet street with no children & most people are of retirement age or not far from it.

Even when it comes to things such as films & TV programmes I so often go to bed early I rarely have time to watch a two hour film, or I need the faster pacing of a one hour programme just to keep me awake. By the time we’ve had dinner in the evening it’s usually 7pm. Then I usually like to watch the news on the television – though quite why I sometimes wonder. I’m often in bed by 9pm, so if we want to spend a little time just listening to some music & chuntering with each other that doesn’t leave much time for much else. I object to watching the television throughout the day. I feel when it is light I should be doing something more productive.

On the whole we are quite happy in our little world. However, there are times we do feel rather lost in time. The music we tend to listen to dates from the pre-pop era. Even when it comes to show music it tends to date from last century. The books we read are often historical – the book I got out of the library yesterday is set in 1565! We do not have the latest technology. Our mobile phones do not have apps or internet connection or cameras.

I suppose this disconnect with today’s society is the inevitable result of being childless, not working, not even being able to fully participate socially in society. When you are still working you inevitably have contact with a cross section of society, a mixture of ages & interests. That doesn’t happen when you stop work.

The only times things really change is when we go on holiday. As all the chores of life, the shopping, cooking, bed-making, washing etc are done for you or abandoned it means I have a bit more energy for being up in the evening & meeting others. We have the time, as do our fellow holidaymakers, to sit & chat. But it has to be admitted often we do holiday in hotels where only people of our age group stay, partly because those are often the only hotels with wheelchair access, partly because we do find screaming unruly children hard to cope with these days.

Maybe it’s just that I’m feeling my age this year. The more wintry weather has brought out my aches & pains. I’m feeling ancient, considerably older than my years. Maybe it’s just that I’m aware I’ll be 60 next year & I’m trying to decide on something to do to mark the event. I had hoped to visit the land of my birth, Brunei, to fulfil a lifelong urge, but that seems impractical these days with out health being so questionable. I’m going to have to think of something else.