Down & up

Yesterday proved to be a downer. After being on the phone for the best part of an hour with Christie’s, going through my medical history, my medication, my family history of cancer, an explanation of the stage & risks of their tests, they finally decided I was not an appropriate candidate because I had had cervical cancer some 20 years ago. If that’s the only reason they could have told me that far earlier in the conversation.

 

They do still want to see me, but for a different scheme. They would like to do some scans, possibly biopsies, to try to solve the question of why cancer cells start to expand in the way they do. There will be no treatment, just scanning. There is just an outside possibility that after they’ve got all the results, in about 8 weeks’ time, they will be in a position to offer me some more active test. I’ve agreed to do it, though I am extremely dubious about the question of whether, in 8-10 weeks’ time, I will be in much of a state to receive any treatment. Or if I’ll even want to bother. Hopefully by then both of us will have received our anti-Covid vaccine, & as things open up with the spring, be ready for a holiday in this beautiful country instead. We’ll see.

 

The Fox tends to think, that on paper, I sound like a wreck. I have, or have had, so many things wrong with me. The reality is that people meeting me, think I’m in good health, full of energy & incredibly fit, even though I am disabled, with a strong determination & positive attitude to get through anything. He’s hoping when Christie’s actually see me they may change their minds. I’m not holding out any such hopes.

 

Now I turn to other, nicer things, like our new car. I’m going to phone the garage to check we are still allowed to collect the car during the lockdown. If we are, the Fox can get down to clearing out all our rubbish from our present car. I’m also going to ring the hospital to sort out some new knee braces. My present ones are beginning to disintegrate. I’m already awaiting an appointment for the removal of the PICC line. That will be a relief – to be able to sleep on my right, fairly cancer free side, without having that sticking into me or being afraid I might accidentally pull it out in my sleep. And, first of all, I’ve started to get the Christmas decorations down & put all that behind us for another year.