Chaos

It’s 10.30 am. I’m just getting ready to go off to the hospital. The phone rings. It’s the hospital.

Before I go to the Tuesday appointment, I need a renal profile blood test.

In the midst of the conversation, it suddenly dawns on me that this is Lancaster Hospital (RLI) & I’m going to Chorley on Tuesday, not Lancaster. I hastily check I’m right & discover I apparently should have had a letter from the RLI for a CT scan at 9am on the same Tuesday. I tell her about the Chorley appointment. She appreciates that there isn’t time to get from Lancaster to Chorley to do both. She gives me the appointments phone number to rearrange the time of the CT scan. Meanwhile I should organise the blood test as that will still be necessary whenever the scan takes place.

I hastily ring the appointments number to get the inevitable answerphone. I try the surgery to be told I’m 15 in the queue. That means holding on for at least 30 minutes & that will mean I’m too late for my whole body bone scan. What is more, the surgery is closed all day today for training purposes.

I continue to get ready for yesterday’s trip to the hospital. The phone goes. The RLI again, appointments this time. They’ve rearranged the CT scan for first thing on Friday. What about the bloods? I knew I wouldn’t be back from the hospital to ring the surgery that day & I couldn’t make an appointment until Thursday which would probably mean it would be too late. They decided after my morning appointment yesterday they would do the bloods at the hospital instead.

We get off to the hospital for my first appointment. Before she puts the needle in I check whether it matters which arm she injects as I will be having bloods removed afterwards. The radiographer is horrified. The bloods have to be done before she injects radioactive materials into me. She hastily rushes off to see if she can find a nurse to take the bloods before she injects me. I’m taken off to a side ward for the bloods.

I return for the radioactive injection. She tries my other arm but cannot get the needle in. She tries in my hand using a very fine children’s needle but still failed. She went back to where the blood had been removed since clearly there was blood, & therefore a vein, there. Third time lucky. We could go.

We went off to find some lunch. We went along to the Mill at Conder Green, in the countryside not far from the hospital. We sat & ate our fish & chips looking out on the canal with cows & sheep in the fields beyond. I made sure I had a pint and a half of cola – I had to have at least 2 pints of liquid before I returned for the afternoon appointment. I had bought a litre bottle of water at the hospital of which I’d drunk a good half on the way to the pub.

After dinner we went along to a garden centre on the way back to the hospital. I duly had a pot of tea – two large cupfuls. We bought a whole range of bulbs for next spring & a rather lovely looking advent calendar – signs of our confidence in my survival through this third experience of cancer. The front garden should be full of small daffs, crocuses & irises. Some pots will have some beautifully scented hyacinths. The back garden should have a range of aliums, crocuses, grape hyacinths & nectaroscordums. Planting them all will keep our gardener busy when she comes later this week.

After that we headed back to the hospital. As we were early we stopped at the WRVS café & had another drink – a large cup of hot chocolate. So to the scan.

The actual scan involved being strapped in across my arms & legs so I couldn’t move. I had to lie as still as possible. The hard bed was moved into the machine. The machine was lowered so it was only about an inch above my nose – not good for someone who is claustrophobic as I am. The scan began.

As I watched the off-centre cross for a while, I increasingly started getting cross-eyed. The cross was coming apart & forming all sorts of illusions. I decided to just close my eyes. Eventually the bed started moving very slowly out. By this time the urge to scratch my nose was growing. As soon as my arms were released I had a good scratch.

The whole procedure took about 20 minutes. By that time my shoulder was really aching badly after being pressed so long onto this very hard bed. It was a relief to be going home.