Thursday 26 September 2013

Home again



We’re safely home. In fact we got back on Saturday but we seem to be in a whirl ever since.

It started with sorting out all the washing. I’ve finally got the last load done today. The weather has not been conducive to putting it outside. It’s not been wet, just cold, very still & grey, threatening to turn to rain at any time.

Then of course there was the food shopping. After virtually emptying the place of fresh food before we went, it inevitably meant the place was fairly devoid of food when we got back. It is difficult to think of what to cook, when you are out of basics like onions, potatoes, garlic, other fresh veg. We picked up some milk on the way home on Saturday but that was it. By Monday we were feeling desperate to get to the supermarket.

Monday also saw the man come to service our gas fire & central heating boiler. We’re now already to face the winter ahead.

Today is hospital day. My July appointment with gastroenterology has finally come through. I’m hoping to be told a little alcohol is now possible. I admit I did slip a bit on holiday. At a restaurant we went to a few times we kept being given a free glass of champagne. I confess I had to at least taste it, but that was it. I can’t say I felt any immediate adverse repercussions. I confess I do still miss my glass of wine with dinner. In the afternoon/evening I’m happy enough on non-alcoholic drinks. Indeed I’ve never drunk alcohol much before dinner except if there is some special occasion or the communion wine at church.

We’ve also been catching up with local news. The big news is that our village pub was broken into & had its safe robbed. The manager has been sacked. A new man should be coming this weekend. We’ve also been getting on top of what’s been happening with all our neighbours & friends.

We’ve also been down to the local town hall. There is a local parking scheme enabling disabled people to park in residents’ only parking & in the pedestrianised areas of Lancaster. My permit had run out so I needed to renew that. We wanted to get that done before we went to the hospital today in case we wanted to stop in Lancaster itself.

All in all, this is the first time I’ve had chance to get onto the computer. It’s been all go.

As for the holiday. The weather was good. The sun shone every day, but there was a breeze most days to make it a pleasant temperature. The rain came at night when we didn’t want to be out anyway. In fact the weather was so good that we were tempted to try to do more than we are really able to physically cope with. Our worries evaporated. Eventually even the nasty taste the care agency gave me as a parting gift dissolved, though we have yet to sort out another agency for help. On the whole it was a good holiday. At present it seems to be a bit overshadowed by the horrendous journeys to & from France. It’s rather put us off the idea of travelling abroad again this year. We had been contemplating going away for Christmas. Now we’re definitely staying in this country, probably at home.

But more of the holiday another day. Sufficient to say for now, we’re home safe & sound.

Friday 6 September 2013

A bad taste in the mouth



The time has come to wish you all well. We will be off on our way to Manchester & the airport later today. I’ve spent the morning so far trying to remember all those chores that need to be done before we go. I’ve locked all the windows, switched off the water heater, fed the birds, collected those last things such as brush, comb & glasses. I’m now scratching my head to think what else needs to be done.

Part of my mind is distracted by yesterday’s events. Angie did turn up for her regular one hour. She had been ordered to ask for two vouchers, not one. Again I refused. She got on with her work. There was no rancour between us & I began to feel happier about the situation. After she had gone, I rang the agency to cancel visits while we were away. I was put through to the same officious person I spoke to last week. She immediately shouted abuse at me. When we get home I will now have to find another source of home help.

I am sorry to lose Angie. I grew to like her & find her visits incredibly supportive. Her words always calmed any negative feelings I had, putting the world into a better perspective.

I was shocked by my own reaction to the dispute. What should have been a civilised legal argument about my obligations under my contract escalated into a shouting match, initiated by someone who ought to be trained to deal better with people, especially vulnerable people.

I feel my integrity has been attacked. Above all, I was shocked to become aware, that if the Fox had not been here to support me, I would have probably have literally tried to kill myself. As it was I was tempted. My love for him is the only thing that saved me. I hadn’t even realised I was so depressed. I clearly need this holiday more than I thought. Hopefully I will return in a more positive frame of mind.

Meanwhile the Fox has written a letter of complaint to the agency, not on the legality of who should pay for the hour but rather on the abusive way in which I was treated. He, like me, worries about others who may also be being abused in this way, who maybe are on their own to cope possibly with even more serious needs.

It all leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

But now I'm trying to focus on the holiday, starting with a meal out tonight with my stepbrother & his wife. 

We'll be back in a couple of weeks. Hopefully by then I will be in a happier frame of mind & better spirits. See you then.

Thursday 5 September 2013

A case of bullying



We’re nearly there. We’ve been to the surgery to collect a carrier bag full of medication. The last book & jigsaw are ready to go back to the library this afternoon. A huge pile of items have been put on one side, ready to be packed into bags this afternoon. (We’re taking one suitcase & some hand luggage. We’ll need some overnight things for our hotel stay the night before our flight.) The last carrot has just gone into the base of a Chicken & Vegetable Pie. I’m just waiting for the filling to cool before I top it with some puff pastry. The last old potato has been peeled for the accompanying mash. I think we’re nearly there.

Now I wait for Angie, our home help, if she’s coming. Last week I had a dispute with the care agency. Angie was on holiday so someone else was sent instead. This person came early & duly told me she was here for 2 hours. I had only arranged one hour a week, two on the first Thursday of the month i.e. today, not last week. As I explained this to the woman she duly left after an hour.

In the afternoon I had a phone call from the agency insisting I paid for the second hour. I pointed out I had not asked for that hour. She told me Angie had made the agreement with them for the extra hour to be once every 4 weeks. I assured her I had very carefully asked for the first Thursday of the month thinking it may cause them an administrative problem, but they had said it was fine. The contract is with me, not Angie. That being so I feel no obligation to pay for their administrative incompetence. She continued to insist. I continued to refuse. The administrator said she would be passing the matter onto her manager.  I have had no word from him. I suspect she’s not even told her.

To my mind this is a case of bullying, verging on fraud & blackmail. She seemed to think since the council gives me vouchers for these visits then I should have no hesitation in handing them over whether or not the work was done. I couldn’t help pointing out if I accepted this policy, then next week they could decide to send someone round all day & insist I pay for all that time. I would be virtually be being blackmailed into it.

I’ve heard nothing further this week. I’m now wondering if Angie will be coming for one hour or two. Or even if she is going to appear & they haven’t decided to cancel our whole contract & not bother to tell me.

I’m certainly wondering whether I should be writing a letter of complaint both to the manager of the care agency & to the council. This sort of bullying should not be allowed to happen. Most people receiving the care this agency provides are vulnerable, often frail, often in need of absolutely essential care for any kind of life, for help such as feeding. Are others too being bullied in this way, possibly blackmailed even out of their hard earned savings & pensions?

Previously I have had only praise for this care agency. When you hear the horror stories of the sort of care, or rather lack of care, provided by some agencies, then this one has seemed excellent. But now I’m beginning to wonder whether I should be looking for another one in the area. I’m feeling duly grateful for living in a town where there are several agencies to choose from & not just a single choice. I can exercise that choice & go elsewhere.

Tuesday 3 September 2013

Curiosity



The last wash before we go is done. It’s hanging out on the line even though it is a rather overcast day. Tomorrow I’m going to do the ironing. Thursday will be impossible with Angie, our home help, coming.

As I was making my chicken pies ready for dinner today, I had the radio on, “The Life Scientific” on Radio 4. This series gives you an idea about the career of various important living British scientists, their life & work. Today it was about Professor Jim Al-Khalili, a man who failed his ‘A’ levels & yet now runs the largest medical imaging facility in Europe.

What was being said vaguely mixed in my head with yesterday’s announcement that children who fail to get Grade 3 Maths & English at GCSE will in future have to stay at school until they do achieve that standard. I thought at the time what a waste of time. Some pupils are just not academically inclined. They are probably great at some subjects but not English and/or Maths. Staying longer at school just gets them more in a spiral of failure & resentment. What is more they may never be able to achieve it. I have visions of 90 year olds still at school because they can’t, or won’t, pass the exam at the required level.

As I listened to today’s programme the thought that crystallised in my mind is that curiosity is the basis of all learning. If you are full of wonder, you learn. If not, you don’t.

I was always a sponge keen to mop up new information, to see how things work, to experience new things. My range of interests is broad. My problem deciding on a degree course was that there were so many that appealed. In fact there is very little I can’t raise an interest in if it is presented to me in the right way. Every day I try to learn a little more, to expand my horizons. But maybe it’s that very interest & curiosity which makes me the intellectual that I am, that enabled me to be a graduate. People I know, who are not particularly intelligent, whether well educated or not, do seem to lack that overwhelming curiosity about the world & what makes things tick, that urge to explore & find out new things. It’s as though they have blinkers on so they cannot see.


Sunday 1 September 2013

Using up



The time has come to once more work our way down the fresh food items in the fridge. We’re off on our hols soon so from now on it’s a case of use up rather than gain any more fresh food or half tins that will go off in our absence.

So it is that the Fox is cooking up some fishcakes today. They will be served with the half tin of sweetcorn in the fridge. Tomorrow is going to be Chicken & Egg Sauté using up various coloured peppers & some eggs. Tuesday is going to be something like chicken pie with plenty of carrots. Then what? I’m not sure. Ultimately I suspect Thursday will turn into a stir fry with any oddments of veg & possibly some prawns for a change.

Our excitement is growing. We’ve now arranged to join my stepbrother & his wife for dinner the night before we fly. As we’re staying overnight in a hotel near Manchester airport that night, & they live not far away, it seems a good idea. This must be quite a record for us. I can’t remember us ever meeting up twice in one year since before the Fox & I got married 38 years ago. We certainly haven’t done so for a very long time.

Though when I think about it I suppose we did meet up that often at the time of my brother’s death &, for that matter, my father’s death. Both were living in Manchester at the time of their demise. Like any family we inevitably we all met over funeral arrangements.

One nice thing did happen last night. We had just finished our dinner when the doorbell rang. It was the clock repairer back with our kitchen clock. It is so reassuring to hear its distinctive tick once more. It is positively gleaming after its clean-up. Well worth the cost of doing it. Now our lounge clock has gone off for its service. We look at the wooden casing with its dark empty face & shudder a bit. It will take longer to be done than the kitchen clock so we’re glad to think most of that time we’ll be away. Hopefully it will be ready for us when we get back.